This article was authored by Cecilia Sepp, CAE, ACNP, and is reprinted with permission. Cecilia serves as Elation Communications’s fractional COO and is the principal of Rogue Tulips Consulting. It was published on the “Going Rogue” blog at www.roguetulips.com/blog.
When people help out, it’s usually because they want to and choose to help. Most of us don’t expect a plaque, trophy, certificate, or anything other than a “thank you.” Okay, maybe a hearty thanks with a handshake. We all want to be recognized for what we do and contribute, but that is not what necessarily motivates us to help.
We help because it’s the right thing to do and a way that we can make our little piece of the world a little better. That’s why it is so important to just say thanks, and in the alternative, it’s more important not to criticize, pick at, or otherwise fling negative comments at those who do help.
There are principles and rules I live by, as I’m sure many of you do as well. One of them is this: I don’t expect to be thanked, but I don’t expect to be shanked either. When I decide to help, it is because I genuinely want to, and I don’t enter into these activities thinking I will be thanked.
Sure, it’s nice to be thanked, but I have no expectations of it happening. However, it too often happens that you won’t be thanked, but other people seem to think they have the right to attack you and make nasty comments regarding what you have offered with generosity and in good spirit. Those people ruin it for everyone else. Their negativity and nastiness are discouraging and disappointing. These are the “2 Ds” and motivate people to NOT get involved and help out.
At Rogue Tulips Consulting, we do a lot of work in the area of ethics. One of the things we learned over the years of researching this topic is this: The one word that leads us all down the path to unethical behavior is SELF. And we are not talking about a positive use of this word, which is self-care.
We are talking about the 4 Enemies of Integrity:
- Self-interest: Things we want
- Self-deception: A refusal to see things clearly
- Self-righteousness: An end justifies the means attitude
- Self-preservation: By any means necessary
I encourage us all to consider what we can do to make the world a little brighter, warmer, and more supportive. A great way to start is with two simple words: thank you.
Learn more about professional ethics by visiting RogueTulips.com.